And They Called It Puppy Love

Next door, I don’t exactly know what the deal is, but they have two dogs. One is a chocolate lab named Charlie Brown. (I love that, it’s so punny.) Charlie Brown has a green bandage on his paw and a cone this week. And they’ve been keeping him in a spare room and he doesn’t like it. It’s so gorgeous out that we all have our windows open and I can hear Charlie Brown whining. It’s breaking my heart. I am sure it’s in his best interest to be in a smaller area with less dangers while his paw heals. But I just want to go rescue him.

I say I don’t like dogs. I only sort of mean it. I had a dog when I was growing up. Technically he was my brother’s dog, but by the end of his life we were very best friends. When he died it was devastating. I loved him so much. I am not a great dog owner, I don’t love going for walks and the whole going outside to use the restroom is not really that much fun in winter, rain or crazy hot days. So most of the time. And I really am more of a cat person. I like cats to come be fed, sit in my lap and sleep in sunbeams. My dog was much like a cat. Except for the using the outdoor restroom and instead of sitting in my lap he sat on my foot.

But to say I don’t like dogs is not really a true blanket statement. There are definitely dogs I do not like. My FIL’s is right up there as the dumbest dog in the universe. But for the most part dogs are okay. Still not my favorite but okay. I’d rather have a cat. But Husband is allergic sadly. He is also allergic to dogs but there are many dogs that shed less and better for allergies.

I however don’t think I could ever get another dog. Because I am scared. I care too much, too strongly and I get too attached. Grief is not easy for me. I still cry about my dog. He has been gone three years now. You may be thinking three years, that’s not so bad. But I also still cry over my cats who have been gone over ten years. I wonder if they knew how much I loved them?

I am sure one of them did. She was finicky, but she would sit on my bed and let me pet her while we listened patiently for the song I wanted to hear to come on the radio. They always did eventually. Just to put this in context, the two songs I distinctly remember waiting for in this situation were Aqua’s “Barbie Girl” and LFO’s “Summer Girls.” Yeah. I was cool. The evening I’m referring to was sunny and I can still picture how my furniture was placed and the sun streaming through onto my bed… and the messiness that was my room. I remember during a song that wasn’t the song I wanted to hear thinking “I just love this moment so much. I love this cat.”

It’s much the same as when I look at C. Just completely overcome with love. Human’s are different. How can you really prevent yourself from loving another human? But pets, you don’t have to have a pet. I don’t know that I will ever have a pet because I love too strongly and care too much. But then I got to thinking that I was denying C a chance to feel that love and have his own childhood perfect moment. So maybe I can open my heart enough for the sake of my guy. I’m not going to rush right out and buy a pet but I’ll actually consider it going forward. Just as long as we don’t wind up with a lemon like my FIL’s.

And in case you were wondering Charlie Brown has been rescued from the little room.